|
Post by eric on Dec 24, 2008 11:14:16 GMT -8
Hi there sorry for you story so is mine, how is the best way one can go back in hypnosis and find out what happen to u before things u can remember, and how do u find counseler that do hypnosis that take you back has anyone read David Burns ten days to self esteem book, he is supposed to take you back to your child hood using non dominate hand or something and do a self healing let me know Eric
|
|
|
Post by sadnesseen on Jul 8, 2009 22:50:28 GMT -8
everything is much sadder since my cat died a over a month ago,,,8 yrs old...still acted like a kitten, spastic, climbing,chasing,playing...we still have a few....but she was something...talked a lot,always ready to fetch and play ;yes a cat! been extremely difficult. friends die, family members, celebreties etc..but this beautiful black and white cat CRUSHED my heart and soul, words cannot describe, seems ridiculous. but this cat was a symbol to me of the child witin me that i had GOTTEN BACK! and now she is dead,,put to sleep...coronary thrombosis or something,,,happened very quickly,,,she was full of life...playing a few minutes before she got an attack. so far i am living through this so far,,,i want my cat back i want my child back,
|
|
|
Post by Moriji on Jul 9, 2009 17:53:47 GMT -8
Time to get a new cat, me thinks...
|
|
|
Post by seayshore on Jul 9, 2009 17:54:53 GMT -8
I know losing an animal that we are so bonded to is very difficult. There is a grieving period just like with humans, maybe even more so. In a few months I'm sure you can find another animal that needs your love. There are so many out there. I've gone through this and it's tough. I'm sorry your cat died so soon in her life. Mine was 18, and I still think of her every day. I loved her very much. All I can say is that I gave her the best life a cat could have.
|
|
|
Post by sadnesseen on Jul 10, 2009 5:39:50 GMT -8
Weird how emotional things trigger OTHER emotional things...must be a bipolar thing = time passage/flow of time = more death, more loss, more grief, more EVERYTHING. Somehow watching my cat die right in front of my eyes summed up EVERYTHING i hate about life = suffering, death, loss. Pain. Going to a doc. today. Maybe Lithium will help. Its kind of scary, my REACTION to this loss. I won't go into detail but...yeah, not good. Well then again, depends on what you think good or bad would be. I mean...nothing. Can't talk about it. We STILL have 2 other cats...one is the friendliest, my best friend type-of-cat, the other...well shes just a cat. The one that died had many qualities that i have NEVER seen in a cat in my whole life. I'm 49 now and i've had many cats over the years. Never had one this funny. Who knows, maybe her condition made her act like she was an overenergetic kitten even though she was 8. Oh well guess i survived so far. The air feels good today.
|
|
|
Post by sadnesseen on Jul 10, 2009 5:47:31 GMT -8
I just deleted my post from a few days ago because reading it made me realise how pathetic I am. Complaining about my past/parents/emotional incest garbage, same old pointless drivel. Maybe my cats death made me blame my parents for making me OVERSENSITIVE??? Hypersensitive? Whatever. I should be past all that crap now!!!!!!!!!!!!! Here's my reply to myself : DUDE, GET A LIFE!
|
|
|
Post by Moriji on Jul 10, 2009 12:14:14 GMT -8
Do you feel ashamed by your reaction a few days ago?
|
|
|
Post by sadnesseen on Jul 10, 2009 14:18:21 GMT -8
Yes I think so. Maybe just embarassed by it. Not really ashamed. Just sick of hearing myself complain about the same junk. Its like my mother complaining to me about my father or something. Maybe its just a deep down hatred for myself. For being born. Maybe I had an instinct I wasn't planned for. I.E. I was the third and last child. Mother 37, Father was 48. Sister was 14. Brother was 11. When I was born. So...there's some weird regret at being born. Maybe. Don't know. I overanalyze. But I know this : It was a WEIRD way to grow up. I never felt HATED...but sort of like what am i doing here??...by the time I was 4 or 5...and my sister was off to college...I never got her room until I was nearly 10 years old [Sept. 1969...I was born in 1960.] and my brother always treated me badly when I was a kid. You know what? Its impossible for me to really explain it. Its a mixture of all toxic stuff. But ashamed...more like guilty for complaining. Maybe I STILL feel my parents did the best they could considering they were mentally unstable.
|
|
|
Post by sadnesseen on Jul 10, 2009 14:23:22 GMT -8
p.s. I was told today I didn't fall into the bipolar category because I don't have the extreme highs/mania/numerous sexual partners/overspendeing etc. I just have the depression and the irritability. Maybe I should get a second opinion. No Lithium for me. Just the same old low dose of xanax and ambien.
|
|
|
Post by Moriji on Jul 10, 2009 21:16:05 GMT -8
Well, my only concern is that I don't think it does a person any good to beat oneself up senseless over this. We all overreact at times, and in this case, I personally don't see it as an overreaction. Death of loved ones, be they human or animal, can be extremely traumatizing. Experiencing grief over the loss of a loved one is to be expected. It is also common for periods of great stress to color your overall outlook on life (temporarily).
So in other words, we all have bad days. I don't think your reaction is a big deal. It's just a part of life. Mourning is natural.
Peace.
|
|
|
Post by sadnesseen on Jul 11, 2009 18:24:07 GMT -8
Thank you, I really appreciate those words of wisdom. Perfect timing to read it, it all makes sense. And its great to be reminded of these things. It was REALLY scary because the incident kept replaying itself over and over and over and over. Still does but I have no choice but to live with this horrible memory replay or join the cat. That very night I can still hear my own screaming and crying driving home with my wife telling me to be careful while I was driving. But i've read other stories about this on the internet and the SAME THING happened to other people driving home after they had to have their pets put to sleep. My wife deals w/ death better than me, her friends and her father died young, even she had a few cats die when they were like 2 years old in accidents. But her family upbringing was VERY NORMAL compared to mine. So her grieving style is different. But anyway...enough of me complaining. I really just meant to say : Thanks!
|
|
|
Post by Moriji on Jul 11, 2009 21:13:46 GMT -8
My view on life is that everything is temporary, including relationships. Because even if something lasts long enough, eventually someone is going to die. I'm not pessimistic about it, it's just something I've come to accept in the last few years. It was part of my growing process to accept how little control I have over events in life. I do the best with what I can control, knowing that things change.
|
|
|
Post by portlander on Jul 12, 2009 0:19:42 GMT -8
I agree with Moriji in reply #57 - we all have bad days. And a bad day here and there, or even a string of bad days, doesn't necessarily mean "bipolar". It seems to me that everything you've described with your cat etc could be PTSD as well. This is just my own personal opinion, but I think that among us survivors of CI and CSA, there's WAAAY too much over-diagnosis going on, and too many cases of PTSD are being called other things such as BP etc, because that makes it easier for the insurance companies to classify and deal with. PTSD takes lots of intensive counseling to deal with, but if they call it BP they can close the file and send the patient out the door with a bottle of pills as a 'fix'.
Sorry if I sound a bit cynical, but I'm discouraged by the way the whole field of psychology seems to have been corrupted by Big Pharma trying to sell pills as a cure for everything.
|
|
|
Post by sadnesseen on Jul 12, 2009 6:52:42 GMT -8
I just deleted my post AGAIN! After reading it, I felt ridiculous.
|
|
|
Post by sadnesseen on Jul 12, 2009 10:27:48 GMT -8
Very true after some research and several other opinions including the ones from this message board, my wife, etc. all these opinions point to PTSD. That explains my decades of self medicating to shut out all the crap I never wanted to feel.
|
|