Post by vl1553 on Sept 12, 2020 15:32:42 GMT -8
Hi!
I became aware of enmeshment/emotional incest about 4 yrs ago. My elderly mom was retiring and moving with me in another state. This brought a feeling of dread I couldn’t fully explain. Discussing this in therapy helped me to realize the depths of the feelings I was experiencing, though it was difficult to explain to anyone who hasn’t experienced it for themselves. To everyone else, my mom and I had the ideal mother/daughter relationship. As I feared, her time with me after retirement, (she splits time between my brother and I in different states), have been extremely difficult. I’ve tried to carve out a healthier dynamic but she doesn’t understand where I’m coming from. I’m married with two daughters in their twenties, and these issues ultimately affected us all. To make a long story short, my mother’s unhealthy intrusions, inappropriate sexualization, covert manipulation, etc., have created a situation whereby she will not be returning to live with us. It has also put my brother and I at odds. Yet she seems to be oblivious to the pain she’s caused. I’m now just trying to process this and heal. I’m glad to have found this resource. Thank you!
I became aware of enmeshment/emotional incest about 4 yrs ago. My elderly mom was retiring and moving with me in another state. This brought a feeling of dread I couldn’t fully explain. Discussing this in therapy helped me to realize the depths of the feelings I was experiencing, though it was difficult to explain to anyone who hasn’t experienced it for themselves. To everyone else, my mom and I had the ideal mother/daughter relationship. As I feared, her time with me after retirement, (she splits time between my brother and I in different states), have been extremely difficult. I’ve tried to carve out a healthier dynamic but she doesn’t understand where I’m coming from. I’m married with two daughters in their twenties, and these issues ultimately affected us all. To make a long story short, my mother’s unhealthy intrusions, inappropriate sexualization, covert manipulation, etc., have created a situation whereby she will not be returning to live with us. It has also put my brother and I at odds. Yet she seems to be oblivious to the pain she’s caused. I’m now just trying to process this and heal. I’m glad to have found this resource. Thank you!