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Post by Starfruit on Nov 23, 2003 21:31:28 GMT -8
Hi, I'm Jan and up until 24 hours ago I didn't even know what Covert Incest was. I ended up in a book store looking for something about one of my courses when the friend I was shopping with handed me a book. It was Silently Seduced by Kenneth M. Adams. When I read the preface I nearly fell over in the store. Right now I dont know whether to laugh or cry. Part of me is torn up inside and I'm so hurt and confused. My situation involved my mother as the parent who wanted to use me as a surrogate spouse. I've heard that same sex situations aren't very common but this is what happened to me. It still goes on 'til today but I am aware of this now and plan to see a therapist as soon as I've got enough money to. I'm very grateful that there are others out there who can understand what I am going through and that I don't have to be afraid to talk to you. I will share my story on the autobiography board when I've sorted through it enough to make it coherent. Thank you for this forum.
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Post by Moriji on Nov 24, 2003 23:23:18 GMT -8
Hi Jan, I know exactly what you're going through! The moment of truth, when your whole life makes sense. It's both liberating and depressing at the same time. Actually, same sex covert incest is more common than people think. A good number of people on this site and the mailing list have had a covertly incestuous relationship with a same sex parent. It takes a long time to come terms with abuse, so hang in there! We're here for you.
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Post by LPH on Nov 27, 2003 17:51:21 GMT -8
Hey Jan, I am new to this forum but I am not new to this issue in my life or the lives of others. I just want to congratulate you on stepping into the truth of your past and I want to tell you my perpetrator was also the same sex as me. It was my father. Nothing physical between us , but all emotional and it is very confusing to say the least. Please read my hugh share that I burdened the hello board with and you'll get to know me some better.
LPH
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Post by wildlavender on Dec 11, 2003 2:53:29 GMT -8
Hi Jan, Just wanted to encourage you and to say I am glad you are here. I was abused by both my parents....covert and overt incest. Not a good cop, bad cop scenerio, but a bad cop and bad cop sort of thing; no one to really turn to when I was a kid. Just recently, I discovered and stopped denying to myself the horror of the incest with my same sex parent, my mother. (Not that it was any easier to recall the stuff w/my father). But, yes, for me it is harder about my mother, the one who birthed me. I can't talk about that area of pain concerning my own mother at this time. The memories and the pain and the grief involved is very raw and much too close inside of me to really face or share right now. Yep! I can see I have some hard work in therapy to do. But I know it will come in its own time. I'm not into forcing myself to try and "get through it" real fast......that kind of self-pushing of the issue can have devastating effects on me. But I'm sure everyone here will hear from me on the subject a bit at a time, 'cause I know it helps me. I am glad that you brought up this subject. Thanks for writing, and yes, you are brave! (Just like LPH said! ) Jan, you will discover strength inside yourself you never knew you had. Blessings, wildlavender
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