overreaction or clear signs of covert incest? Apr 25, 2008 0:15:58 GMT -8
Post by omg200 on Apr 25, 2008 0:15:58 GMT -8
Hello im glad that i found this forum and i hope this will help me understand what is really going in my family.
I would like to know if my mothers behaviour is clear covert incest behavour or there is some other background , because things have alot of similarities and all this is hard for me because i dont wanna judge anyone and have a guilts inside me.
Im aware that i might overreacted but based on all i cannot ignore everything,so here is my story:
Im 28 years old male living with mother ( 51 ) , im child of alcoholic father who mentally abused family and i can feel all
consequences still today even if this ended like 7 years ago.
I dont doubt in mothers love even if i never felt it right way , but on the other side all this is also strange relationship,
alot of fight and arguments between both in a way that doesnt seems like mother-son relationship and that worries me.
The relationship is more alike husband-wife relationship.
Last 2 weeks behaviour from mother suddenly changed , although in past i already noticed some small deteils which could look like in a way covered incest , or at least not normal behaviour from mother.
One of those i remember was cleaning in my room the dust,while dressed in revealing clothes ( underwear ).
All that happened directly infront of my eyes even if there was choice that she could covered herself fully.At least i think most of mothers behave diferently in this situations more appopriate.
Im not sure if covered incest can be in a way overnight situation , but last 2 weeks this behaviour was different , visible
different from most of years before.
Here are those situations which confused me because i dont seem them as natural mothers behaviour.
1.alot of hughs and different tone of talking:
( she got home talking to me about health and how worried she is , while hugging me around waist , later mentioning
how she need to dress better and carry about herself better - i dont know real reason or connection with health issue )
2.kisses on my neck ( short kisses )
3.hugs while me helping her
( i helped her something and she said to me: like you look so tall - cuddly way of talking and again hughs )
4.hugs while normal talk and sentence which i dont understand:
( random chat about furniture on how some friends have positioned bedroms and living rooms , after that she said:
- and in our home your bedroom is there .. and mine in that direction ... ( she showed visually )
After that she laughed and she was kinda "shy" ...
5.offering me help in bathroom to wash my back and talk:
Entering and saying: i wont look( 2x ) and telling me: if you will get a GF she should wash you like that too ...
( kinda looked by words like - you should tell her ... )
This is also weird because i think every son can alone decide what to do with GF and when to have her.
6.later "coincidental" question:
- She was in sexy underwear and asking me if she look sexy ( kinda masked question but basically meant same thing )
That happened 1 hour after bathroom sentence which i found quite weird coincidence ( although i might be wrong ).
7. "accidental" naked upper body:
- She went from her room throught door and stopped infront of door there and changed in a way i could directly saw her
naked body ( didnt looked like random thing - she could also cover and changed in her room before )
7. dressing infront of me:
She came into kitchen and dressed her nylons infront of me , while tell me to tend to find a GF ...
So this were last happenings which worried me , i also heard opinions that this maybe means that i need to find GF , i mean
this behaviour ( although mother knows how hurt i was at my last relationship ).
I find this theory very strange because i dont see logical explanation why would all attention then be on her , if this is
real reason behind that and why would i need learn how to find GF from all those sexually somehow connected situations.
Problem in this relationship is because all is acting like very normal thing and beside that mother is kinda controlling
my life ... like nothing is ok , always is something wrong , in a way this is psychically hard for me , and with last
happenings that is even harder , because i dont know real reason for such behaviour.
In a way all happenings could look also like her sexuall desires for myself and that she is just masking all with those
like "normal" events.
One the end i would just like to ask 2 questions:
- is this typical covert incest desire / behaviour or there is possible way of explanation ?
( which has nothing to do with this )
- does covert incest parent really wants sexuall intercourse or this is just way of controlling
and manipulating the child ?
Thank you in advance for answers , which will help me to live better with knowing what is really happening around me, i wish
nice weekend to all , M.